Do not sin again

John 8 is a very inspiring story. It talks about God’s forgiveness and acceptance, and the sinfulness of people. It arouses our curiosity of what Jesus is writing on the ground. Today, I would like to draw your attention to one Jesus’ particular saying, that is, ‘Do not sin again’. What Jesus means or what he is thinking when he says not to sin again.

Apparently, the issue is adultery, and therefore, not to sin means no adultery anymore. I have no objection to it, but this understanding is chiefly from the perspective of the condemners. In other words, adultery is serious in the eyes of the condemners, and this is why they bring the woman to stone, but this may not be the case of the woman. It is good that the woman would not commit adultery anymore, but it means nothing to her if this is not what she is concerned most. My observation has to be taken into account, because the reaction of the woman suggests that she does not mind to be stoned. She has no intention to defend her accusation by arguing that there is no another adulterer being caught. Her indifference is not necessarily because she has confessed what she has done and is willing to be punished, but rather because she does not find any meaning for survival. She is not waiting for justice to be done, but meaning to survive. Death is not a threat to a person if she is already in a mode of life with no soul (走肉行屍). If this is the situation of the woman, understanding not to sin as equivalent to not committing adultery has no meaning to her at all. I do not believe that what Jesus concerned most is morality, but rather it is the person whom Jesus cares most. We do not have enough background of this woman in order to understand her existential struggle, but we can get insight from a poem, Tomlinson, written by R.Kipling.

…And a Spirit came to his bedside and gripped him by the hair…
And they came to the Gate within the Wall where Peter holds the keys.
‘Stand up, stand up now, Tomlinson, and answer loud and high
The good that ye did for the sake of men or ever ye came to die --
The good that ye did for the sake of men in little earth so lone!’…
‘O I have a friend on earth," he said, "that was my priest and guide,
And well would he answer all for me if he were by my side.’…
But now ye wait at Heaven's Gate and not in Berkeley Square:
Though we called your friend from his bed this night, he could not speak for you,
For the race is run by one and one and never by two and two.…

The Spirit gripped him by the hair, and sun by sun they fell
Till they came to the belt of Naughty Stars that rim the mouth of Hell…
The Devil he sat behind the bars, where the desperate legions drew,
But he caught the hasting Tomlinson and would not let him through.
‘Wot ye the price of good pit-coal that I must pay?’ said he,
That ye rank yoursel' so fit for Hell and ask no leave of me?...
And Tomlinson looked down and down, and saw beneath his feet
The frontlet of a tortured star milk-white in Hell-Mouth heat.
‘O I had a love on earth," said he, "that kissed me to my fall,
And if ye would call my love to me I know she would answer all.’…
But now ye wait at Hell-Mouth Gate and not in Berkeley Square:
Though we whistled your love from her bed to-night, I trow she would not run,
For the sin ye do by two and two ye must pay for one by one!…
And Tomlinson took up the tale and spoke of his sin in life: --

Once I ha' laughed at the power of Love and twice at the grip of the Grave,
And thrice I ha' patted my God on the head that men might call me brave."
The Devil he blew on a brandered soul and set it aside to cool: --
‘Do ye think I would waste my good pit-coal on the hide of a brain-sick fool?...
Go back to Earth with a lip unsealed -- go back with an open eye,
And carry my word to the Sons of Men or ever ye come to die:
That the sin they do by two and two they must pay for one by one --

The story of Tomlinson tells us one important thing. Sin is not just simply what one has done. Nor is a good person who does good works. Rather sin is that one fails to be oneself. Firstly, failure to be oneself is one fails to recognize and fulfill one’s destiny. In Christian understanding, it is calling. We are called to be human beings, the one to reflect God’s glory. Tomlinson’s story reminds us that even though a person may have done something good, he can still fail to be himself, for the good he has achieved is the good of others. His life is the life of other, not his life. Secondly, failure to be oneself is to put blame on his misfortune. I steal because I am poor. I behave badly because my parents are indifference to me. There may have truth in it, but this gives oneself away, for he only sees excuses, and fails to see himself as the agent. Thirdly, failure to be oneself is to give oneself up. I have sympathy with those in great difficulties choose to end their lives, and I would not condemn those who see life as a burden. It is always our responsibility to bring color to life and make life easier.

What is the existential situation of the woman? I have no clue, but according to what I have elaborated, not to sin should not be superficially reduced to a matter of no adultery, no homosexual, and no gambling. Rather it is to affirm that you should not let yourself being without yourself, for God would not give you up.